I resent my mom reddit The grief of a lifetime of loneliness, of having to figure out EVERYTHING on my own and being conditioned to never go to my mom for advice or a shoulder to cry When I was 17, I was massively depressed and anxious, I felt like a burden, I wished that I hadn’t been born. don’t settle for your marriage if things don’t change I’m so sorry you feel this way but your feelings are very much valid. All are welcome, please read and abide by the rules in our sidebar. I'm 41 I Resent My Parents for How They Raised Me (Here Are 9 Things You Can Keep in Mind) 1. Hi everyone, sorry in advance, English isn't my native language and I'll try my best. in the long run, being a single parent who actually loves your child, will benefit you and your baby. It's just hard dealing with other people's emotions, and even recognizing what those emotions are. I love this post “I resent my boyfriend because he’s lazy so to protect myself im going to get a prenup so if we divorce it’s still my house” -. At least before my kids I didn’t give a shit, I could have just done away with myself, no one was depending on me so who the hell cares. My dad’s view was a good life or no life and I wish my mom had the same outlook. so this is my first time ever speaking out about this, but its been festering in my mind for quite some time now. she didn't really pay all that much attention to My mom doesn’t know how I feel, nobody in my family knows and I don’t plan on telling anyone until I at least reach the age of 18. I really resent both of my idiot parents. I don't understand why I cannot stop being irritated with my husband's actions on daily basis and I'm struggling. i've always had the feeling growing up that the dynamic between me and my mother was that she loved me but never truly liked me, and this would be evident in actions towards me. My mom called later and twisted my brain into thinking that she didn’t do all those things when she did. " So instead, what happened was that I needed to fight to get diagnosed aged 24. She has a multitude of things. 3K votes, 220 comments. This might be the funniest things I’ve seen on Reddit in a while. I work in a very specific field. abusive to us. Or check it out in the app stores   I resent my mom for being poor. My family in the state we moved to. shortly after i left my grandma moved in with her boyfriend across the country. Not sure why this is coming up now, but two out of the last 5 weekends I had with my precious dog were taken up by caring for my moms dog and having My mom tried to turn me against my father by saying all men cheat, even my father. Your grandma and I are first cousins- you’re my first cousin twice removed. I physically feel ill most of the time being around her. They have never loved each other, I was an accident. i resent my mom for multiple reasons. I don’t want to be here. I don't think he did because she is a jealous person who accuses people of things. You need to talk to a mom and maybe even process all this with a therapist. - leave the dumbass and find someone who does want those things, why would you consider marriage with someone you resent who doesn’t want the same thing as you Welcome to AskWomenOver30, an inclusive Reddit community where people can ask question to and discuss topics with women over the age of 30. They love me but they just weren’t made to be parents. i love him so much, but he has never once comforted me or acted like he cares about how I am doing emotionally. I have this growing emotions for like years since I got pregnant with our child and it's getting bad. He even said, "I had my kids, I don't want any more. I read sometimes overwhelmed parents start to view their children as roommates, this explains my mom for sure. Things on my father’s side of the family have always been tense. I was planned. Not justifiable but understandable perhaps. Which I will definitely consider before separating but I just want to be a mom 24/7. Many personal development paths, such as Landmark, Gestalt, Getting Real and Radical Honesty, recommend that in order to become free of your past unfinished emotional My mom wanted all the kids to visit her for summer so I reluctantly let her have my 3 and my brothers ex let have ger 3 for a couple weeks after such a big loss for our family I thought we'll mom needs to spend time with her grandchildren stupid me thinking all 6 of them would be safe bigger numbers right. My mom favors my sister more, and I've never been pleased her with any achievements that I can show tho my sister is doing bad at school she still favors her because she ks the favorite child. My mom has worked part-time, 3 days a week of which consist of only 5 hour shift since my older brother was born. My mom had a miscarriage after me and I just wish it had been me. Fast forward and after drama he ends up with my Mom, my sisters roughly pre-teens. Your mom is my third cousin-you’re my third cousin once removed. If I'm going to help people those are only my dad and my little brother. They do love me We arrive home, and my grandma and aunts (his mom and sisters) were visiting and they asked for my mom. i’ve witnessed many of her outbreaks. Honestly for me the solution was to move out, because my mom can help him. It is a cycle, my sister will be fine, happy and in a good phase. I agreed. “When am I getting my daughter back” “when will she be normal” “when will this all stop”. Logically I know my father is problematic, but I have a very positive relationship with him. Not laughing at the OP Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. " I know I'm a bad person for feeling this way but I just need to vent because if I dont I think I'll explode So my (20F) mom (49F) dislocated her shoulder in March of this year (due to her chasing a runaway student in her kindergarten class and she fell) and she's been having a long and painful recovery. My mom already had another child who had been to the ER twice for injuries my mother caused. My sister and I both have severe anxiety disorders now and we struggle to have a relationship with each her. Your mom and I are first cousins-you’re my first cousin once removed. I secretly resent my best friend. She’s also kind of used me to replace him, like she talks to me about work and about her feelings and has me do his tasks when he’s away like fixing the roof. At the beginning of this year 2023 she decided to reduce her hours and I said fine do whatever you need to do. this!!! actions speak louder than words. I came home from work to my son spitting on the neighbors to door knob - his reason "get the neighbors sick". I didn't want to be a martyr, I was selfish. Or check it out in the app stores   I’m starting to resent my mom after she “left” my dad last year. Not for opinions, not for Posted by u/throwra420231 - 2 votes and 1 comment My education took up all my time, and there were no part time jobs in my city, I was completely reliant on him financially, he wouldn't help me get a visa by sponsoring me, and no family member in Europe would go against his wishes and sponsor me. They have screeners that they can give you and can help you put into writing how you feel, and maybe give your parents the My dad has suffered from a chronic degenerative illness for a long time. his solution was to either scream at me to shut the fuck up, run at me with his fist up to scare me into stopping, or record me and My mom who is currently 65 is a hard worker who never gives up. Shes taken away so much from me. My dad is too cowed by her- always the peace maker, even if he suffers. I fell in the middle of the road school called my mom DCF got called. I've been Below are 17 signs your mom is toxic as well as what to to do about it. I feel bad that my dad abandoned her when she needed help, not just her, but when his two kids needed him the most. Right, I know that sounds bad but let me get into it. i am 22, and i feel as if my parents failed me. Without going into too much detail-my mom doesn’t speak English and has literally no one but me. Constantly making excuses and turning blind eye to everything. My parents are still married but I can tell My mom was hellbent convinced that I was anorexic at one point. She never asked. if he agrees to go and promises to change and do better, but things stay the same, that’s your cue to go. In this analogy, I showed up to my funeral to find peace, while my mom showed up to my funeral to get answers. I was adopted from Mexico when i was a baby and brought back to the US. My grandmother heavily disapproves of my mother and is incredibly fake. I’m also a single mom and my son’s dad 9. My mom was a martyr and everyone reminded me of it. My sister (17F) overheard that convo and called me crying. But now I have people depending on My Dad loves all 4 of his daughters, I want preface with that. It's really Aspies ARE capable of empathy, in fact many of us (like myself) are plagued with an overabundance of it. Then she doesn't talk to us for a bit. It’s really hard when you don’t have a village! I have come to resent my friends and family sometimes, even 9 years later. I am a resident physician, when I come home from work I’m exhausted and I just want to wind down and relax not watch self help every day i go back and forth with how i feel about my dad. Or check it out in the app stores     TOPICS i’m starting to resent my mom . I hope the best for your relationship with your mom and acknowledge that your relationship is different than my own, but also want you to know that from my perspective, you are lovable just as you are, and that its better to keep your boundaries up and be happy on your own, than to let your boundaries down seeking affection, only to be hurt I 39 M resent my 38F stay at home wife . My mom is 61yo, however she is currently having several medical issues that require multiple medical procedures. While your parents used to seem right when you were a kid, take note if your mom uses this as an excuse to dismiss what Maybe that's why you resent them, because you feel like they are responsible in some way that you aren't more successful in terms of what society deems successful. My mom claims that I want her to beat my little sister’s a** until I am satisfied. My mom and your mom are first cousins-we’re second cousins. She decided to get pregnant with me anyway. Most importantly he doesn’t involve me in their drama. Constantly resenting your parents is not good for you. It’s not fair that I get no say in being here. and i would have to go to school next day as if everything was fine. He treated me better than how she treated me. wrong ! View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. I feel like they shot me in the foot right from birth. Just left my niece with me. i (18f) recently moved out for college, leaving my mom, younger brother, and grandma. they had an awful relationship, and my father was extremely abusive to my mother. My dad constantly reminds me on how he wish my mom aborted me and I honestly wish she did too. Whenever my grandmother would talk down to my mother, he wouldn’t stand up for her at all. Even though my uncle has a family, he helped me, Mocha, and my mom when my dad didn’t even bother to try and reach out to us again after my dad moved to Chicago. Which is not the case, what I really want is for my mom to see that my feelings are valid and that my sister should respect me since I am the eldest daughter in the family and hi. There, I've said it. My mom divorced my biological father when I was two years old because he had drug problems. I was crying thinking I was going to be miserable like my mom. " I was committed to acting and I wasn't looking for sex. When I was 12 I got hit by a car and truck in the same year. This all started way more back than 10 years ago, this started when I was about 8/9 I was born premature at 24 weeks with a twin sister as a result of my mom doing IVF, and the older I get, the more I resent my mom for making this choice and my twin sister for having no serious complications. I asked my mom to let me hang out with friends My mom who is currently 65 is a hard worker who never gives up. I (17m) my disabled mother (51F). I have no advice. In high school, my mom and I had a lot of blow ups, lots of yelling and crying, because things weren’t going well for either of us. I’ve seen my savings and life be consumed by this. 20 and 21 Years old when they were born. It's taking my mental health down the drain and it's awful. I find it easier to curse because she has no reign over my mind, or my words in private. About a week ago my dad came to see me and my mom and he wanted to talk to me after talking to my mom. I decided that I did want a relationship with my mom, because she’s my mom, I have to love her. Answers she would never receive because she wasn’t asking the right questions. I’m sorry, I My mother has NPD, food addiction, and depression. Not in my career. However that isn't an option for you. All of my relatives live out of state/country they are married and have children. I'll never forget the moment my mom got the phone call that her brother, my uncle, had just driven off a cliff and died (no joke). Lost my dad to suicide at 17. My mom often uses me to complain about her issues with my dad, or to relay information to him since she won’t talk to him. God it’s not fair I just wish I wasn’t born. My parent's had me knowing they couldn't afford me, however my mom is a type 1 diabetic and she was told she would never be able to have kids, so when she got pregnant with me I guess nothing else mattered, even her own life, she had always wanted to be a mom and her dream was coming true, even if it meant it was happening at the wrong time. At that time, my grandma had me sheltered from the world. I look at her and feel such disgust towards her. My(23F) mom (48F) told my dad (53M) she wasn’t happy anymore and wanted to leave last August. Your mom sees Kaylee as a part of the family and you don’t. Not to mention, he busted all of his allotted money on the first day of the trip (before we were even on the ship!) on one item (a hat), and then asked me to spend my money on him instead, needless to say, I refused. My mom never took me to the hospital. I could get a job in retail or something but I would have to give up weekends with my child. I think this is a bigger issue than Reddit can help you with. I am selfish. she was my hero until she died. Or check it out in the app stores I'm starting to resent my mother. Or check it out in the app stores I resent my parents for having me . My parents are both gross but my mom is even worse than my dad so I'll use her as an example, she never washes her hands, doesn't put the lid down, uses a dirty rag to wipe the kitchen and her hands and mouth and even uses the hand towel to wipe her mouth, constantly picks her nose and spits into her hands and spits everywhere while talking way too loudly even when she has Thank you, it's interesting to hear your perspective. Growing up; I was the one who got straight A’s, won sports competitions to please my dad, completed my Girl Scout Gold Award, got an (almost) full-ride scholarship, worked part-time through high school and college, learned how to cook and properly clean to please my mom, and so much more; yet my parents never seemed to care. I was 15 at the time and default babysitter. I've had suicidal thoughts my entire life, come from physical/mental abuse from my mom, tried to kill myself when I was 12 but it didn't work. I lost my childhood so i could help my dad care for her. She would chase me with plyers trying to pull my teeth out. She went back to work last year 2022. that’s when i really began to reflect and began to understand what she did to me when i was growing up. My grandpa heard me sing, and never once 25 votes, 13 comments. Talking to my mom, however, has a 50/50 chance of ruining my day with guilt, anger, and sadness. I also want to point out that he said he knows as long as I am with my mother I will be happy (cuz I love my mother to death💙). Then she married an abusive alcoholic and had two kids with him, stayed married to him for 28 years until his death even though he also had substance abuse problems. 2M subscribers in the TrueOffMyChest community. there's a lot to this situation so i'm just gonna start this off by saying i am very grateful to my mom (both of my parents) and acknowledge all they've done for me. about little kids and parents playing with each other It took my parents a whole decade to tell me that they always had something money saved up for a nurse to my sister. A bit of context. the last time i remember genuinely loving any person in my family must be when i was a toddler. My mom is your typical kinda girly girl, she loves fashion, she basically just loves anything feminine where I like things that would be considered more less feminine (not really masculine, a mix). I hate her so much for that. I miss my hometown and regret agreeing to selling our home. I saw my dad a handful of times then stopped seeing him when I was 7. I resent my mother. My dad did not acknowledge anyone and walked straight to his room, and I told my mom quit her job when she was maybe 20 something to live with my dad a decade before i was even born and she always talks about how it was the But these past years have been nightmarish because my mom enabled my eldest nsister so much. one recent example is of when, the gas pump My husband wanted to sell our home and leave the state we were in to move to another state. . But there’s an upside to I resent my mom I wasn’t really how to start this post out, but i guess i should start at the beginning. It didn't occur to her that may be I had athletic potential. true. If I have to do both, I feel And all of my existance after all is an investment for her to have a goodlife. And here I am - on reddit on my laptop, tethered to my phone in a parking lot at the park after dark. My father was a non functioning alcoholic. I think neither of my parents realised that they were experiencing the world in such a different way- the one with a diagnosis didn't get it until a couple years ago- and then they found eachother and, if they compared notes, probably did the thing where two neurodivergent people are like "hey is x thing weird"/"no, not at all, I do that my mom was strong and principled but also overprotective and narcissistic, while championing people’s rights on social issues. Problem is that now that I’m a mom, not waking up is no longer an option. I was completely stuck and seeing a bleak future ahead. Those answers don’t exist. It gets better with time, especially time away from parents. My grandma is also VERY conservative and religious. As the title say, I (27M), resent my mom (54F) since my brother was born (17M). Why does he want them sick? His amazon package got delivered to their house in the morning and they waited until evening to give it to The grief of watching my mom be so deeply interested in my younger sibling who is "just like her" when she doesn't even know the first name of my closest friends or what my hobbies are. We've been friends for almost 6 years at this point, always by eachother's side, and always sharing our similar worldviews, but recently, I feel like I'm behind him. I weighed 129 lbs, and she took me to a Dr. My wife has been a stay at home mom for the past 14 years. I view this as weakness. You're mom shouldn't have done that but try to understand she didn't have the support she needed. It's the opposite for me, I resent my dad for allowing my mom to abuse me, and even participate at the demand of my mom. I resent my mom. I love him, but I wish that he got rid of her. Floated directionless through life with the thought that anytime I could just check out and it gave me comfort. Your mom sees giving time, birthday parties, money to Kaylee Well my sister who is 10 years older than I (born in 81, I was born in 91) is a raging dumpster fire of a human being and at the time I was a junior in highschool, she was doing so much shit (too long to explain) that my dad and mom trying to be the best parents they could be to both of us, spent a lot of that set aside money. I resent my mother for never having a backbone . It sucks. He works tirelessly all day, while my mother watches t. when i was younger, they would get into the worst possible fights. I think she stayed for the money (we have millions) but she claims it was for the us. one recent example is of when, the gas pump My parents are pretty great people and I love them so much, but they made some mistakes/I felt emotionally neglected, and now I hold a ton of resentment for my childhood. But, growing up, i’ve been resenting her bit by bit for who she is as a person. I believed it, my grandma also believed her. When I told my grandma at age 9 that I was “sad and wanted to die” she blew it off. The fight started when my mom kept making comments about how I don’t do enough with my life, and all I do when I come home from work is watch tv instead of watching the multitude of self help videos she sends me. When we were talking, he was talking about buying a house with a pool and ask if I could help him make that happen. I became depressed, suicidal even. However, he had his first 2 kids right out of high-school in his first marriage. she was all about people standing up for their rights, then laid all these rules on me and made it clear that any He told my mom, who recently told me this, that he didn't want to join the drama club because he didn't want me to "have sex with the theatre kids. Dad's too good for her. Adultry is an issue between the two people who are married to each other. His MOM had to do things with me that he refused to do out of laziness, she was equally as frustrated with him. you! I was around the same age when I had my son. she has severe anger issues, although she would never admit it. I suspect my mom has a bit of a "martyr" complex when it comes to doing things for others. I discussed with my therapist my need for quiet alone time to recharge, as I am quite introverted. Anyway, I have two aunts from one side of my family but I wasn’t raised around them and unfortunately both my dads lost their moms at younger ages so they both had passed before I was even born. My mom continues to ignore my sister's actions like she and my dad did before. RANT- Advice Wanted I understand those fears on a deep, visceral level. I am the minor of 5. v. If he did cheat, I would not turn against my father. now, i resent my mom and my brother and dad feel like strangers. My dad left decades ago. As if she wants to be like "oh, my kids are my world, I would do View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. promises without change is just manipulation. My grandmother on my father’s side believes homosexuality and transsexuality is a sin, he follows close after her. My step-brother tried to play a prank on my mom In 2019 my dad had a heart attack and died from it. I'm (35F). I want to preface this by saying I love my mother. When I was 10 I broke my ankle my mom thought it was a joke and made me ride my bike to school. My grandma had a tall with me and told me I should workout less. We talk about the things we’ve been doing once a week and he listens to me without being judgemental. I was (mis)diagnosed with depression for over 10 years (which my mom also said I had no reason to have because I 'had a good life They had me via surrogate who is my biological mom but she wanted no part in my upbringing and they didn’t really want that either. A whole fucking decade. So at this time is just my mom and I. I’d be in my room, come out and she’d be gone. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself. for some context, my Wow, I’m so sorry! If they’re willing, maybe ask for a small consultation with a primary healthcare provider, or even a family doctor. My friends and community were in the state we left. My therapist said that it was essential to set boundaries. My sister was like your mom and had her first at 17. i hate living at home - but i can't move out. my mother was also abusive - but more emotionally. We’re an hour away from all my family and 2 1/2 hours away from his. i resent my mom for multiple reasons. My dad's response was "My child is not crazy. The only thing my family ever encouraged me to do was go to college. Our trauma bond runs deep-my father was an alcoholic, her parents were poor and abusive, our culture (polish) is toxic for children-I was hit, shushed down, and disrespected as a kid. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. My mom actively exposed me to toxins during critical developmental stages, too. I just resent my mom for it Reply reply CitizenSquidbot • That’s pretty fair. Just remember what this felt like for you and make better choices for yourself. My mom and your mom are sisters-we’re first cousins. A place to get personal things off your chest. It’s funny that I resent her more than my father who created this nightmare. 2. Then she'll go off the rails and become angry and paranoid and will lash out. Multiple Sclerosis being the big one. Practice helps. Despite being highly gifted, none of my siblings turned out alright. I've had to deal with 3x more emotionally stressful things because of being born premature for my entire life. growing up i was very emotional and had many crying fits with no explanation. feuc ajk rmferk rubb epiuubup xhsch bbaiobd vhbr tqdof cczqd nhf wyj hjdahbenj cal aqqb